Podcast

Siblings are often overlooked in conversations about addiction and family recovery. They can carry fear, anger, resentment, responsibility, and grief while watching both their sibling and their parents struggle—and may feel like there’s little room for what they’re going through.In this episode of the Recovery Through Relationship series, Heather talks with Dominique Dajer, founder and host of For Love of Recovery, a podcast created to support siblings of people struggling with substance use. Dominique shares her experience loving her younger brother, Justin, through years of substance use and multiple attempts at treatment.Whether your loved one is actively using substances, in treatment, in recovery, or somewhere in between, this conversation is a reminder that you don't have to choose between trying to control someone and abandoning them. There is another path- one where you can care for yourself, honor your own limits, and remain a meaningful source of connection in your loved one's life.In This EpisodeThe often-overlooked experience of siblings affected by addictionMoving away from “rock bottom” and tough-love approachesStaying connected without taking responsibility for someone else's recoveryUsing harm reduction and Invitation to Change in family relationshipsThe anger and resentment siblings can carry when addiction consumes the familyWhat Justin has shared about Dominique's support while he was actively using substancesWhy early recovery can bring a different kind of fear for familiesRebuilding trust and learning to let go of control in recoveryKey Takeaways:Connection and boundaries can exist together. Dominique learned that she could protect herself without making the relationship conditional on Justin's sobriety.You don't have to wait for “rock bottom” to offer support. Families can respond to where someone is right now while allowing natural consequences to occur.Siblings need support too. Their anger, resentment, fear, and needs can easily be overshadowed when so much of the family's attention is focused on the person struggling with substance use.Changing your approach isn't about finding the perfect way to make someone recover. Dominique practiced new skills because she wanted a healthier relationship with her brother—not because she could guarantee that doing so would make him stop using substances.Recovery doesn't instantly erase fear or restore trust. Family members have their own healing and “rewiring” to do as they learn to respond to the person in front of them rather than continually reacting to what happened in the past.Resources Mentioned:For Love of Recovery podcastInvitation to ChangeCRAFT (Community Reinforcement and Family Training)Harm reductionNar-AnobnBeyond Addiction: How Science and Kindness Help People ChangeJohann Hari's TED Talk, Everything You Think You Know About Addiction Is WrongConnect With Dominique:Dominique is the founder and host of For Love of Recovery, a podcast dedicated to helping siblings navigate the challenges of having a brother or sister struggling with substance use.Website: ForLoveofRecovery.comResources From Heather Ross Coaching Live Class. 5 Hours. 5 Life Changing Shifts. One entirely new way to navigate your child’s addiction – with greater peace, confidence, and hope. https://heatherrosscoaching.com/5-day-peaceful-mom-blueprint-experience/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠A New Perspective about enabling – If you've ever worried about enabling, this guide is for you! https://heatherrosscoaching.com/perspective-about-enabling/